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01 svibnja 2008

Andy Bear & the Bum Chums
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Sam Wilkinson
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    In the late 11th century AD, an ancient tablet was uncovered in central England. This tablet of unknown original was kept safe for centuries in a rural monastery, hidden in a secret chamber beneath the floor. It survived England's invasions and many wars until it was unearth in 1955 by the famous scholar Sir Reginald Bigglewigs. Bigglewigs found the tablet after following a trail of ancient clues that dragged him across the world, from Giza to Beijing to Orleans and, after 30 years of hard work, to England. The age and origin of the tablet remain a mystery. Inscriptions were written in ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics, Chinese calligraphy and Norse scrawlings, all long forgotten by the mists of time. The antiquity and diversity of the writings meant that they took 5 years to fully translate. Once translated, they told of an ancient prophecy; of a group of five brothers, five noble warriors, who would come to the world in a time of need. They would, as the prophecy foretold, bring peace, love and unity into the world with their unique cacophonic powers, liberating the masses with the power of rock. It is said that these 5 men would come into the world not knowing their destiny. Their leader would be a bear of unspeakable ability, a seemingly heaven-sent prodigy, and he would lead the band of brothers to glory...
    Now, in the 21st century, the prophecy written on that ancient tablet has been long forgotten, but the legend lives on...

    Andy Bear and the Bum Chums were formed in late 2007, mostly as a joke. An Alby-less incantation of the band existed earlier for the purpose of playing a song written by the musical genius Sam Wilkinson, and an even earlier version without Alby or the Great Bear auditioned for the 2007 Charles Campbell exchange 'Battle of the Bands' (and failed miserably) with a unique rendition of Summer Nights, from the musical Grease. But Andy Bear and the Bum Chums as you know them today formed for the purpose of rocking out to the Jack Black classic, "The Legend of the Rent" from the School of Rock. The epic rock-fest was a complete success, and the band performed for the year 10's for their orientation, blowing several minds, melting many faces, busting scores of guts and allegedly causing mass orgasms within the crowd. Some will maintain that one cannot spell orgasm without Sam.

    Recently Andy Bear and the Bum Chums auditioned for Westside Arts 2008 in hope that the rest of Victoria could be liberated with the power of their rock, and Sam's short-shorts.

    Now the Bum Chums move forward, to a brighter tomorrow, unknowingly pursuing their destiny to fulfill the prophecy of old. Someday, the world shall be liberated through the power of ANDY BEAR AND THE BUM CHUMS!
    Sam Wilkinson    01 svibnja 2008 04:45